EP09: It Started With One Run - Jahn
When was the last time you had a drink then?
What's the date today? Seventh. Um, you know, I got to the end of 2024 and I just feel like I was just not really in a good place physically and mentally. So yeah, a few years ago, if you told me I was running a marathon, I would've said, "No, not, not a chance."
How important mental health is and why, why do you think it is?
How important, especially in blokes and men.
I just think because, you know, obviously I lost, I've lost, you know, people to suicide and-
How long, what, how
long ago was that? Um, yeah. How did it affect you? And I probably dealt with it in ways that I probably shouldn't have. What's one conversation you wish more men were having?
I don't know. Maybe like, I feel like-
Jan, welcome
Thank you
From, fresh from the Gold Coast Marathon
Yep
How's the body?
Bit tender Yeah Bit sore, um I'm probably just as sore as I thought I would be. Mm. I'm starting to come good, but yeah. Oh, um, the stairs are not my friend at the moment. I think going down them's the worst. Going up them's not too bad, but yeah, going down them, I've gotta brace myself.
Mentally feeling good as well?
Yeah. Yeah. Feel really good.
Pleasant? All right.
Yeah. Well, I mean, I got my time goal, um, by a few minutes as well, so I'm pretty happy with that. I would've liked to have done it, you know, a little bit quicker, um, 'cause I know I've got it in me, but I feel like, you know, it's my first ever marathon, um, first proper, like, big race like that, so yeah, can't complain.
Over it done.
Yeah. All right. Yeah, I don't wanna be too neg about it, but yeah, I feel like I probably could've done it a little bit quicker, but that's just marathons, you know. It's a different beast, so, um, I think- I feel like I did well, so I'm happy, happy with how it went,
yeah. So going back to 2024, was that the goal when you started, like, the fitness and-
Um, I don't really know what the goal was.
Yeah. Like, I feel like at the time, um, you know, it got to the end of 2024, and I just feel like I was just not really in a good place physically and mentally, so, um, I feel like the goal initially was just to try and lose a bit of weight. I mean, I was not... I wasn't, like, 100 kilos or anything. Like, I'm always been a pretty small dude, but for me, I started to notice it.
Um, I think I got up to, like, 85. Um, and so for me it was, you know, more like a physical thing, try to lose a bit of weight. Um, and then it started to be a bit more of, like, a, like, a mental thing as well, so, um, yeah. So started 2025, decided, decided to start running. Um, and then I guess the more I did it, the more I just kind of enjoyed it.
Enjoyed, like, you know, you know, like, people noticing as well. Like, people being like, "Oh, you know, you look like you've, you know, trimmed up a little bit." Yeah. And I was like, "Fuck, that feels good." You know? Not like, "You're a fat," you know, "fat fuck." So no, like, that, that side of it was cool as well, and then, you know, I kind of started noticing and I was like, "Oh, I'm not, like..."
You know, I'm obviously not the quickest person on Earth, but I was like, feel like I was kinda naturally sort of quick. Um, um, from what people told me at the time. I had no idea. Yeah. People were like, "Oh, that's not too bad," you know? So I kinda stuck with it and yeah, the goals kind of changed as we went along, and the bar sort of rose as we kinda got more into it, so yeah.
And here we are.
Going back to when you... Before you started, like, the running and the fitness, what was, like, your typical sort of weekend as... And what was, like, the- Before
kids?
Yeah, as far as before k- What was it like? Was there a switch with kids, or?
Yeah. I feel like, you know, like, before kids it was, like, like, lots of big weekends.
Mm. You know, like, especially, you know, if I was single it was, you know, over to the boys' house on a Friday arvo. You know, probably drink Friday, Saturday, Sunday. You know what I mean? Like, that was pretty typical, pretty standard. Um, but then I feel like when kids- When my first daughter was born, like I was still drinking a bit, but I wasn't really like, I wasn't really partying.
You know, I'd still see my mates or go out and, you know, catch up for beers or whatever. Um, but I was probably drinking, yeah, I was still drinking quite a bit. Mm. Drinking at home or, yeah, with family and friends or whatever. But yeah, just kinda wasn't going out-out sort of like we used to.
Mm.
So yeah.
Why, why running and what was the first run like, would you say?
I think the reason that I started running, um, there's a guy I follow on Instagram. His name's Kieran, but he goes by the Instagram handle @kfit. And I just... It just popped up one day and he's, you know, covered head to toe in tattoos and he just spoke about, you know, his problems with like addiction and, you know, drugs, alcohol, you know, being overweight sort of thing.
And I kinda think a lot of what he said just clicked for me. You know what I mean? I just kind of, I was k- I could relate to what he was talking about. So for me, that was like my biggest sort of inspiration at the time.
Yeah.
Um, so yeah, I kinda just decided one day, I was like, "I'm just gonna..." 'Cause, you know, in his, in his videos he was obviously running and, you know, doing workouts, whatever.
The gym nearly never really interested me. Um, but I was like, "Oh, well maybe I'll give running a crack." And I did, and I think it was like- I didn't have Strava, I didn't have any- I didn't have a watch. I think I used like literally like Google Maps on my phone to figure out like how far I was going. I think I went literally maybe like two k's before I started blowing, like- Mm
you know. I think I got maybe three k's in total and I was pretty cooked. Um, so yeah, I, I wasn't any good after that one, but I th- but after that I kinda just like slowly sort of increased the, the volume. Like I just stayed with like three k's and then like couple weeks pass and I'd try and do four and then five and, and then I just kind of increased it a bit more.
Probably increased it like a little bit too quickly. Like I was stacking like a lot of runs back to back, you know, wasn't fueling properly and shit shoes and whatever else, and I just ended up, I ended up hurting myself, which is always- Yeah ... gonna happen, but, but yeah.
Before, like, would you say you were like borderline alcoholic then?
Mm. Where you on drink and drugs or you just needed a, thought you just needed a change and cut it out and?
I don't know. I wouldn't go, I don't know if I'd go with alcoholic, you know what I mean? Like I could, I always had breaks. Mm. You know what I mean? I, it's, it's always, going completely sober has always been something that's sort of played on my mind, and maybe it's because I thought, you know, in the back of my mind that maybe I did have a little, a bit of a problem.
I feel like there's always been an unhealthy relationship. I don't, wouldn't necessarily call myself an alcoholic.
No.
Um, but I've always known and always been fascinated by the idea of like, you know, going sober, and that was a big thing with KFit as well because obviously like, you know, he doesn't drink or anything else anymore.
So for me I was kinda like, "Oh, that's cool." You know, like even growing up, like listening to like Parkway Drive and stuff, you know, like they were like straight edge and I always thought that was cool. Um, so yeah, I think that played a big part in it and it's just always something that kind of- I don't know, played on my mind a little bit.
But yeah, at the start of every year I'd do like a month, two months. One time I did like four and a half months, that's like the longest I'd ever done. Um, but I feel like I'm big on routines. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I understand. So if I'm like, if I'm drinking all the time, it's not necessarily like I'm going out and bendering.
It might just be like I have a couple on a Friday arvo and a Saturday, but then I kinda do that like every week, you know what I mean? But if I'm not drinking, I'm not drinking at all. So, you know, depending on what part of my life I'm in, it depends on like, you know, what sort of cycle I'm, I'm in. Mm-hmm.
And I guess I was just stuck in that sort of, that cycle of just kind of drinking all the time casually and-
Just needed like a... So the running was like a switch to getting out of it, trying to... Like a new focus and sort
of- Yeah ... a new
routine.
I think so. Yeah. And I, I feel like, you know, I wasn't really doing, I wasn't doing any sort of like exercise.
Like I was surfing here and there randomly, playing a little bit of social touch, but I wasn't really doing enough to like probably burn the calories that I was consuming ... from just the beer alone. So yeah, I feel like the running was like something at the start to keep me fit or to like try and lose some weight, and then it kinda became like a bit of an obsession 'cause I was enj- 'cause I started to enjoy it a lot.
Um, so yeah.
Yeah. I've, I've never, never been a big runner.
Yeah.
I, uh, in COVID I met with my mate every Sunday.
Yeah.
Um, we done like a 5 to 10K, and then one day we done a 16K, and I was- How did that feel? Never again. The last K I felt I was running in slow motion. Yeah. Like it was... Um, so now and again I do like a 5K just to keep the fitness up, but yeah, it's not for me.
Yeah. I don't know. I just kinda... Do you ever, do you listen to music when you do it? 'Cause like I see people running along with just
nothing. It depend, it depends. Like most of the time I will listen to music. Okay. Like, you know, the we- on the weekend, on Sunday, I was like, "I'm not gonna go music. I'm going no music until I really need it" and I was playing my music within like five minutes, so.
Oh, right. But yeah, I, I can do, I can do some runs without it, but I do like to, I like to be in my head a little bit, you know, listening to music that I listened to when I was younger and stuff. Mm. So, um, yeah, I don't know. Everyone's different though. Some people swear by not running with music, but I don't know.
I
couldn't do it.
Depend- I guess it depends, you know. Yeah. I run early. Like I'm up, if I'm, if I'm running I'll be up at 4:00, try and be on the path at 4:30. So I like to have something, otherwise it's just, it's very- Mm ... very quiet and very still and a bit eerie, so... But yeah.
Did you ever think you'd run a marathon?
Nah. No. Fuck no. All right. Nah. Like, I mean, at one point I, I kinda went through a phase where when I started running I was just like sort of thought, not, not that I was killing it, but I was like, you know, I'm doing like decent runs and I'm feeling pretty good. And I used to try and run like big runs, like without, like no food, no fuel, no electrolytes, no water, no nothing.
I'd just try and like pump out these big runs, and then I'd wonder like why I couldn't walk properly the next day. Like I'd, I did a couple where I did like, the biggest one I ever did was like probably 30Ks, and that was with K Fit. He, I won the... It was like a bit of a long story. He'd like had a, had a competition going on Instagram, like a fastest 10K time, and I sent him mine and ended up winning.
And then the prize was like a spray jacket, and he was like, "Well, how do you wanna get it?" And I was like, "Well, let's go for a run." And he's like, "How far do you wanna go?" And I was like, "Well, I wanna do a big one, like 30." And the Friday before, I think I'd run like 21, and this was on the Monday. And yeah, no brekkie, you know, shit sleep, no fuel, no electrolytes, nothing.
And I got to like 24Ks, and then I just basically couldn't, couldn't move. Move on, no. I pushed through all the way, but I, I couldn't walk properly for like a week and a bit, and I couldn't run for like over a month. So yeah, it just cooked me. So yeah, when I was in that phase, I was like, "Oh, I could just run a marathon.
It's easy." Mm. You know what I mean? Like, but I could run to like 25Ks pretty sweet, but then I'd be cooked for like a week. So yeah, it wasn't until I started like training properly at probably the start of this year that I was like interested in running a marathon, 'cause I was never really like too crash hot with the idea of, like, massive crowds.
I was like, "Nah, I'd hate it, I'd hate it." And then I did, like, a little, like a 10K, and the vibes were sick, and I was like, "This is pretty mad." And then I did... Then I signed up to the GC30, I did that and, you know. And then, and then I ended up getting a ticket to the marathon, so. Mm. Yeah, a few years ago if you'd told me I was running a marathon, I would've said-
Nah
not, not a chance.
When, when you first started doing it, when you were, like, struggling doing them, like, 2Ks, would you have think, like, quitting and just going back to the olds?
Hmm. I don't know. Like, so that's the thing. I didn't, like, stop drinking when I was running. First time. Like, when I first started.
Like, I was still drinking. But I think I switched my beers to, like, you know, like a low-carb beer- Mm ... to try and, like, help with, like, the weight loss and stuff. But I don't know. I kinda didn't, I didn't really think of quitting, but I don't know. I was just kinda living, I guess, in the moment. Yeah. I was just kinda like, "I, I'm sort of enjoying this.
I'll just keep doing it and see what happens," and. But I never thought it would take me, you know, as far as it has.
No,
yeah. You know, it's only... I've s- I've only been sort of doing this page on Instagram for, like, you know, six months now, but it's, there's been a few cool opportunities, like- Mm ... you know, like this one as well, so.
Appreciate it.
I didn't, um... Yeah, I didn't think that running would... I don't know. I would always see people e- exercising- Yeah ... and be like, "Look at this dickhead," or whatever. You know what I mean? Like, I was one of them. Yeah. And I was just like... I'll be at the pub on a Friday drinking beers- Yeah ... and I'd see people running past me and be like, "Oh, look at this loser."
Mm. And now I'm like, "Loser."
Now you're one of them.
Yeah, exactly. So.
When was the last time you had a drink, then?
Um, what's the date today? Seventh. Um, almost, like, five and a half months ago. Yeah, wow. So it was my birthday. So usually, 'cause my birthday's at the start, like, like, 19th of January. So usually, you know, have a big crissy or whatever.
Yeah. Drink for my birthday, and then I have a break. But I just feel like this break has been very different to, um, some of the other breaks that I've had. Like, I've just genuinely haven't wanted, hadn't want to drink. Like, I haven't wanted to have a beer or anything at all. Like, usually I get to, like, a month or two and I'm, like, itching for a beer.
But I think it's got to do with, like, the running. Mm. The running side of things. And I think it's because I can see, like, it is progressing, and there's been opportunities and stuff. So I've been like, I don't wanna, you know, um, compromise, like, my training and stuff. No. 'Cause, 'cause you just feel like shit.
Yeah. And you just turn, you just, you're just lazy, and you're unmotivated. That's what I find. Like, I've got no problem with people drinking. No, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's not like I'm not- No ... it's not like I'm not ever gonna drink-
Ever
again ... e- ever again. No. But I'm just enjoying, like, feeling good.
And I think, like we talked about before with, like, routines and stuff, like, I'm in that routine now where I'm like, I'm training, I'm running, you know, and I'm seeing, like, the benefits. So I'm just like I can't really see myself going back. Mm-hmm. So that's why I haven't really been stinging for a beer or anything like that.
Feeling a lot better mentally and physically?
Oh, I, I feel like this is the best I've felt ever.
Yeah.
You know, mentally, physically. Um, it's the best shape I've ever been in physically, but yeah, mentally it's definitely a big thing. Yeah.
What would you say, like, training for the marathon, like, would you say you've built better, like, mental resilience pumping through them, like the bigger runs, or are you just kind of...
Yeah, I feel like at the start it was like a lot, a lot more of like a, am I... Like, you know, I remember running like 5Ks and then I was like, "Oh, sick." And then I ran like 7Ks, and then I remember running like my first 10Ks and I was like, "Holy shit," like that was big. You know? Mm-hmm. And running 10Ks is big, is a big thing.
Right. There's a lot of people out there who can't, and I feel like I, I was just trying to increase that, my guess that mileage by like a couple of kilometers each time. So yeah, when I was getting to those, you know, 16s, 17s, 18 kilometer runs, I was kinda like, "Am I gonna be able to do this?" And now I'm like, you throw a number at me, I'm, I know I'm gonna be able to do it.
Mm.
It's just a matter of-
What is a marathon? 42K, is it?
42.2.
So that's- Yeah ... 26 miles.
Yeah. 26 miles exactly. Right. And 42 point, well, .195- ... if you wanna be specific. But yeah, I think, um, the biggest I'd ever run before that was 33, so in that training block that I just did. Mm. So, but yeah, the 42 is, it's an- it's next level.
No.
Yeah.
What
was like the emotions running, crossing the line? Was-
I was h- I was very happy. It'd be- I had my, I had like all my family there at the finish line, which was pretty cool. Oh, lovely. I had like my partner, my two daughters, um, my mom and dad, a couple of my sisters, some of their kids. Um, so yeah, it was cool.
It was, it was a... You know, I was, I was hurting a little bit, so it was nice to cross that finish line. But it was, um, it was a, a massive sense of achievement for me 'cause it's been a, you know, it's been a lot of early mornings and, um, big training sessions and big weeks and, um, so yeah, it was a big, big accomplishment for me.
I'm pretty proud of myself- Mm ... when I, when I- Mm-hmm ... crossed that finish line, so.
What's like the target now? Are you going to like more endurance running, like the longer distances, or?
Um, I've thought about the idea of doing like a backyard ultra, which... Have you heard about those? No. What's that? So basically it's like, it's 6.7Ks every hour on the hour.
So it's basically like a loop, and they set up, you have like a little like gazebo with like a little like, I guess like a camp set up, and you basically run the loop and then whatever time you've got left over, you just, you can rest or eat or, you know, if you've been going for days you can sleep or whatever, if it's for 15 minutes.
And basically it's like a last man standing sort of thing. Oh. So you just keep going until you s- As long as it... Yeah ... you can't, basically. So I've thought about, there's one next year in March on the Goldie up at like Main Beach I think it is, and that's where the GC 30 was. So I was like, I kinda know the course.
But I've thought about that, um, but I think I just wanna do- I want to do another, like, half and see how fast I can do that, and then the goal is to try and get my time, you know, as close to three hours or below.
What was your... What was it for this one? Three-
3:23.
Yeah, so-
So my goal was 3:30, under 3:30, and look, to be honest, I feel like if I d- got like 3:29, I would've been like, "Oh, shit," like, but for my first one, I feel like I'm pretty stoked with that, so...
But yeah, I feel like closer I can get it down to 3:00, um, you know, the happier I'll get. Yeah. I'm happy with that. You know
what I mean? I'm, I'm s- It's not bad for the first marathon.
Nah, not at all. I'm stoked with that. Yeah. So, um-
And what, what charity did you raise money for?
Um, Bears of Hope. So- That's a good one.
Um, yeah, so I originally, um... So a couple of my friends lost their son, um, in December, um, lost him at birth, little Oakley Bear, and, um, they, uh, had signed up to the GC30. I had, I didn't really have any intentions of actually doing it. This is kind of where my training sort of locked in a lot more and, um, uh, they signed up to the GC30, and they were fundraising for Bears of Hope because Bears of Hope, um, helped them, like, in that, in that time.
Mm-hmm. Um, they do, like... They donate, like, little gift packages, and they, like, um, pay for, like, you know, counseling sessions and things like that. Like, they're an amazing, amazing organization, but they run off, um, off donations. So, um, they were donating for them because obviously they helped them out, and I wanted to sort of jump in and do what I could do.
Um, and so I signed up to the GC30, um, and started fundraising, and I think I fundraised, like, or raised over, like, I think it was, like, 1,400 bucks- Mm.
Um, which was pretty cool. Yeah. And then so I just wanted to sort of keep that going for, for the marathon, so I decided to keep fundraising for Bears of Hope and, um, you know, I ran my, um, Bears of Hope singlet on the day as well, so- Very
nice.
Yeah, that was cool.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, good.
Yeah.
Now you've spoken to me a bit about, like, how important mental health is.
Mm.
Why, why do you think it is? Um, like especially in blokes and men and...
I just think because, I don't know, especially like for me, like, you know, I can sit here and be like, "Oh, my mental health was shit," or whatever. But like I kinda look back and, you know, obviously I lost, I've lost, you know, people to suicide and, um, I've seen people in situations where like obviously their mental health is struggling or I've been struggling myself or whatever.
And, um, I guess there is that, that stigma of like not talking about it- Mm ... and things like that. And like, you know, losing mates to suicide, you know, you always wonder like what you could have done or what you could have said. So it's... I guess it's just, you know, for me it's like, I guess the importance of like m- physical movement, you know, moving your body.
I've always known that. I just feel like at times I've just forgotten it. Yeah. You know? It was, whether it was playing touch or, you know, going for a skate or going for a surf or even just going to the beach and going for a swim. I feel like it's, it's always something I've known that I needed to do, but I feel like, you know, the partying or the drinking at times has kinda like overshadowed that.
Mm. And I've kinda just got stuck into sort of that and sort of forgotten. And I'm, then I'm wondering, oh, why I feel like shit all the time and why my mental health isn't any good. Yeah. So yeah, I don't know. I guess it just... There's a few different reasons, but I guess for me it's like, um- Uh, I guess I just see the importance of, like, the link between, like, physical movement and, um, and mental health- Mm
just because, you know, especially in the last, like, you know, six months how my, I guess my mental health- Oh, improved. Yeah ... has improved just, like, so much. Not like, it's not something that I... I wouldn't say that I've got, like, depression or anything like... I'm pretty, I'm a pretty anxious person at times. Um, and I feel like anyone can relate where they've had, like, times in their life where it hasn't been, you know, amazing mentally for them.
Um, but yeah, it's not like I've got, like, clinical depression or anything like that. But I just feel as though, like, it is such an important thing, you know, for males especially- Mm ... to talk about, um, if they are struggling. Um, and yeah, I just, I guess it's because I've just seen the benefits of, you know, the whole physical exercise thing and, and for me just, like, it wasn't really something that I was doing, so I was kinda going, "Well, why do I feel like shit all the time?"
And it's like, well...
Doing the same thing every week. Yeah.
Exactly right. So...
That con- continuous cycle. Yeah. Suppose like wh- a lot of people underestimate, don't they, the link between, like, physical activity and the mental health side of how it, how it does improve.
Yeah.
Like, for me, I don't, like I say, I'm not a massive runner, but go to the gym, like, two or three times a week.
Mm. Play football or soccer too, but-
Yeah ...
and just sitting down having a chat.
Yeah.
That's what I do at Nisses. Yeah. And I feel like if you, like, you know, you'd feel it if you didn't go to the gym for a couple of days or- Well, I'm the same as you- Yeah ... like a routine. If I'm not in the routine, I just, head goes all funny. I get frog, get frog, get like annoyed, I suppose annoyed at myself 'cause like say- Yeah
if you're not in your routine, all my, all of my friends and family, like close to me know if I'm not in my, I'm like a bit of a robot. Like if I'm-
Yeah. I'm the same. I feel like if I- Bit
prone if I'm not in
it ... miss a run or something like that, I'm just like, I'm just anxious. Mm. I'm so anxious, and I hate that.
In your own, in your own head, like just- Yeah ... uh, I'm the same.
So the, the movement side of it is so, like, yeah, it's so important like you said.
You spoke about, um, losing two friends to suicide.
Yeah.
How do I... Well, how long ago was that?
Um, there's been a couple. Um, the most recent one was... Oh, geez, I wouldn't even be able to tell you what year it was.
Um, few years ago now. Maybe 20, I wanna say maybe like 2020. Mm. Um, friend I met in Bali, Walter his name was. Um, he was y- a South African dude, just absolute legend. Like, you know, very, very happy, energetic, you know, bubbly dude. Um, met him in Bali on, like, a solo trip and then, um, he ca- he came, came to Australia.
He was, he was living in Australia for a bit. He became pretty good mates, one of my best mates. Um, Joel as well, and then, yeah, um- Yeah, I don't, I, I, yeah, I don't really know the exact details of what happened- No, there's a lot ... but, you know. Yeah. But, um, but yeah, that one hit hard. Um, you know, there has been a couple others as well, but it's just, yeah, like, like we said before, it's you never know, like could you have said something or- Mm-hmm
you know, even just like a little message to, you know, I don't know. You just...
Oh, y- yeah, you think about everything, don't you? Like kinda the what ifs, could you do more, but-
Yeah. And sometimes
you like- You never know, do you? Exactly. Like that's the problem with sort of hardening it because the suicide rates in blokes is-
Mm
through the roof.
Yeah.
And, uh, you don't know if, 'cause, you know, blokes don't talk, do they? They don't-
No ...
don't ask for help. They don't wanna...
And especially like someone that looks like, presents like-
That's the problem. Everyone, yeah, yeah ... as like so
happy and like energetic and out there. You wouldn't know.
You, you'd be like, "Oh, they're sweet."
Mm.
Like I saw, I think it was LSKD did a really, really good video recently. It was like two guys running next to each other, and they... The, the way that you, the wa- the way that you watch the video, you'd be like there's one guy who's just like yapping, yapping, yapping, and the other guy's just like a bit down and whatever, and you'd think it was the other guy that was depressed.
Mm. But then there's a shot where it's just like the guy that was a bit down or whatever and not talking, he's the one running and his other mate's gone.
Mm.
So it's just like that side of things, like talking about like, you know, you never really know, especially the ones that are like, act as if they're okay.
Yeah. Those are the ones I feel like you gotta worry about, you know? Um, which again, which is why it's so important to like have those conversations-
100% ...
as hard as they are.
No, yeah, it's not, never easy. I think it's, uh, that's the first hurdle, having to actually go and talk to someone.
Mm. It's
probably the hardest thing to do.
Yeah.
Once you do it, it's-
Yeah ...
way
easier. But even bringing it, just bringing it up, you know what
I mean? Oh, yeah. It's
hard to- Most people shrug it off- Yeah, yeah ... and just be like, "Oh yeah, I'm sweet." Yeah. And you kinda go, "
Well..." And then the other thing, like I said, bringing it up, you don't wanna... It's harder 'cause if you, if you think your mate's struggling and you go to your mate and ask, "Are you struggling?"
They might get, you know, defensive. It's just, it's hard on the both, both ends, isn't it?
It's a tricky one. Yeah. And then, you know, and then s- it's kind of sometimes you kinda go, "Well, what's, what, what do you say?" Sometimes you don't know what to say either- Mm ... and it's like... But then sometimes you don't need to say anything, you just kinda, you just need to listen and I don't know.
Everyone's different.
No, I
mean I
You know. Not, we're no experts either. No. It's just like, it's just important- Exactly right ... to check on your mates, I suppose- Mm ... and talk, but-
Yeah ...
how did it affect you during this?
Um, yeah, I mean, you know, I was, you know, um- It was, it was tough, you know. Um, and I probably dealt with it in ways that I probably shouldn't have, um, you know, just by rinsing ourselves on the weekends- Yeah
and drinking lots and whatever, just to sort of forget about it or whatever. But yeah, I feel like it, it's never, you know, it's never nice losing someone, but especially, especially that way. Mm. You know, it's... I feel like that's next level- Mm ... harder. So yeah, it's always hard. I just, every time it happens, I always just say to everyone, like, "I just hope this never happens again," you know?
So, um, 'cause yeah, it's, it's not a nice- No ... not a nice thing to have to deal with. But it's, you know, in a, in a weird sort of way, like it does sort of bring people together, you know what I mean? Mm. Like, especially if it's like- Maybe not that one necessarily, but I feel like there have been times where people have kind of like come together and, you know, banded together and, you know, had some, had some good conversations or whatever.
But yeah, it's a shame that it takes something like that to happen- Yeah ... for, for that to happen. Yeah. You know? So...
Did it, did they, uh, change the way you see life? Like put different, different sort of-
I feel like- ... spins on it ... I feel like at the time, if I'm being honest, pr- probably- Yeah ... like probably not too much.
I mean, like, yes, it did in a way, but like, I just feel like I was just in such, I don't know, I was making just bad choices and bad routines and whatever, so it wasn't clear. Like, whereas like now I look back and go, "Oh yeah," like, you know, I don't know. I'm not really sure.
Mm.
Yeah.
What, uh, did they influence, like, like your running, did that influence that?
I think so. Mm. I think it's always been a big driving sort of force for me, especially, um, you know, with that sort of stuff happening. Um, I think for me, like, you know, I'm not trying to ram anything down anyone's throats- Yeah ... and I don't wanna preach, you know, like, "You gotta go sober," and you know, this and that, like, "Drinking's bad."
'Cause like, fuck you, do whatever you want. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. You know? Like, if you can, if you can drink beers on the weekends and be super productive and whatever, then sweet, no dramas. But like, I just feel like for me, and again, back to that I'm not saying that I'll never drink again, but it's just like, I just know I'm so much more productive, like without it.
So I think for me it was just seeing someone that has lived a certain lifestyle ha- change, and just seeing that- Mm ... and just being like, "Oh, they're getting up early. They're going for a run," or, "They're doing this or they're doing that." And I guess like, with what I'm trying to do is like, you know, I'm trying to just like, I guess, promote that as well.
So people that are, you know, feel like that they're lacking a bit of direction or struggling or stuck or whatever, they can look at that and go, "Oh, you know, like this dude's come from a similar situation," or, "I can relate to that," and like, "He's doing this," and you know what I mean? Mm. It's just like seeing that and, but not like ramming it down people's throats and being like, "You know, you need to get up-" No, yeah.
and you need to train, and don't drink." No. You know what I mean? Like- Yeah, yeah. Not
them like motivational quotes.
Yeah. No, it's not like that. It's just like, if someone can just see it and they can just kinda go, "Oh-" Mm. "... fuck, I like this dude." Like that's cool. You know what I mean? Like- Yeah, yeah ... I feel like that's, that's the sort...
'Cause that's sort of what it was for me. It was just like seeing it and going, "Oh yeah, like I can respect that." Like, you know, and I feel like there's a lot of people out there who could- I can definitely relate to, like, you know, my life and the situations that I've been in or whatever and, you know, resonate with things that I, maybe I talk about or whatever and just kinda go, "Oh yeah, I'll, I'll give that a crack."
Mm. Because it's pretty cool. There's a massive community, like, online, you know, of, you know, guys especially just getting around each other and, you know, supporting each other online and, um, you know, which is pretty cool. You know? Mm. Just complete strangers just, like-
Getting round you, yeah ...
yeah, getting round you, being in your corner just because, because they wanna.
Yeah. You know? So that's pretty cool as well.
Need more of that, don't we, I think.
Yeah.
Like, so I was, I, I was kind of the same as you. I think, everything I've been through I used, like, drink and drugs and-
Mm ...
numbs it and-
Yeah ...
you realise, you realise, it took me about seven and a half years to realise like a short-term fix.
Yeah. I
was just going blackout and-
Mm ...
that's why I, I, I kind of like to have a drink now and again. Yeah. I'm not like a complete
sober. Yeah.
It's, like, productive, like waking up hungover, you don't wanna do anything. I'll just-
Yeah ...
I've, 'cause I'm going back to UK in August, so we'll-
You'll have
a few. I'll have a few, yeah.
My mate's getting married, so I think I'll have a few then, then. Yeah. But I just don't really enjoy it as much now. I think when I was in that phase where I would just- Yeah ... I'd just go to blackout. There'd just be no consequence. I would-
Yeah. And you're waking up just so, like, riddled with anxiety. Yeah.
And that was like-
What have I done now?
Yeah. You kinda go, "Oh, what did I do?" And I, like, towards, like, the end of sorta last year I, I remember, like, being like, "Oh," like, "Was I all right last night?" sort of thing, and people were like, "Yeah, you were sweet," like, and I'm like, "Oh, shit," like- Mm ... you know what I mean?
It's just like that feeling and I was just like, it's not even worth it.
No.
Like, you know? And again, like, I might wake up in a couple months and go, "Oh, I might... I, I wanna have a beer," but at the moment I'm just enjoying.
Yeah.
You know? And like you said, it's just, I just find I'm just so much more, so much less productive, you know?
I just... You've got that fog.
Yeah.
You know? And you just- Brain fog sort of thing. Yeah. And some- and if you have a few on, like, a Friday or a Saturday it can take you till, like, you know, Monday or Tuesday to sort of come right, and it's just like, I don't know. It's just, I, for me at the moment it's just not worth it.
No.
Oh, yeah, I have, like, three, three now and I'll get hungover.
Yeah. See, that's, it's not even worth it, is it? It's like three beers. Well, no. That's nothing, you know?
But-
Yeah ...
it's hard, innit?
Yeah.
What, what, what, what's one conversation you wish m- more men were having?
I don't know. Maybe like, I feel like to talk about like mental health is like, it's a, it's a tricky thing.
Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? And to talk about what's going on inside someone's head can be a really, really tricky thing, especially if you don't know how to listen or what to say. But I feel like the, the most important thing that men should be talking about is like, you know, definitely like the, the link between like, you know, moving or physical movement and like how much of an impact it can have.
You know, 'cause I've got, you know, people that, you know, I've spoken to about mental health and like, you know, like, "Oh, my mental health's shit." But it's like, "Well, what are you doing?" Mm. You know, you fucking drinking, doing drugs, not, not exercising.
Yeah.
You know, of course your mental health's gonna be shit.
Like, so if you change those little things, even if... Like, you don't have to start running, but I feel like you've gotta, you gotta do something. You gotta have some sort of routine that doesn't, you know, involve drinking.
Mm.
You know what I mean? Like, which is, I feel like a lotta people do. Like that's their like, that's their sort of outlet.
It's like, you know, pub with the boys, few beers, have a, have a bit of a yarn, have a D&M, while you've got a beer, liquid courage. Yeah. But like everyone wakes up next day like-
Well, yeah,
it's forgotten about ... you're forgetting about what they talked about. Yeah. You know what I mean? So it's like, I don't know.
But those sorts of conversations needed... I don't know. It's a, it's a, it's a tricky one. It is,
yeah.
But I just think it's like, for the people that are stuck, you know, I feel like they n- if they just understood like, I guess the benefits of like maybe having a break-
Mm ...
and getting stuck into a bit of exercise routine sort of thing, and just seeing how, how fucking good it can make them feel.
Mm.
You know? Like it has for me.
Some wonders for you, yeah.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. So, but it's hard. You can, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink. So
it's like, you know. What's the biggest lesson you've learnt?
I guess it that how important it is to-
Physical ...
to move.
Mm.
Yeah. And like how like it just, it's a flow-on effect.
I feel like, well, for me anyway, I'm just talking from experience, you know. For me it's like, if I'm feeling good physically, obviously then I'm feeling good mentally, then I kinda wanna keep that rolling, so then I'm like probably gonna, you know, I'm probably not gonna drink, well, as much or if at all. Then if I'm not drinking, it's like I wanna, I wanna probably eat healthier.
Then when you're eating better, you know, you wanna train more, and you just... I don't know. I feel like it's just like a flow-on effect of like good things whereas opposed to like, you know, if you're drinking, especially if you have like a big night out, the next day the last thing you wanna be doing is eating healthy food.
Yeah. You wanna eat shit.
You wanna go straight to Macca's
or something. You know what I mean? Yeah. And then it's just a flow on, and then it's just like, and then the next day you're not prepared 'cause you got no lunch for work or whatever. Yeah. And it's just like, I don't know. But I f- yeah, I don't know. I feel like for me the biggest thing is just like that, the whole physical movement thing.
It's just, it's just so important.
Has like the motivation dropped at all? At all?
Nah. Um, I had a dude like hit me up one day, like, uh, that messaged me via inbox. I shared one of his videos, which I thought was pretty cool, and then he was like, "How are you going with your training, bro?" I was like, "Yeah, good."
And he was like, "Do you reckon you can sustain it though?" And I was just like, "Are you trying to sell me some fucking sort of course or something?" Like, and I kinda took that like, like I'm all about you like flicking me a message and being like, you know, talking about my story or whatever. Yeah. But like, don't try to sell me some fucking course and shit.
Like, I was just like, I was a bit off that day. Yeah. I was just like... But, like, nah, I feel like I struggle. I, like I fucking love running. Like I love getting up and I love running, so I like get excited to go for a run. Whereas like the gym side of things, the workout, it's like, it's a chore. Mm. I hate it.
You know, and at the start I wasn't doing it, and then I was like getting little niggles and little injuries, and I was like, "Okay, I'm gonna have to start doing like some strength training just for my legs." Mm. Like, the, I literally just do what I need to do so that I can run.
Yeah.
You know? So that for me, the motivation behind like...
'Cause I'm just doing it at home. I've just got like a couple of dumbbells, couple of kettlebells, some stretch bands, like that sort of thing. So most of the time I'm doing it like in the girls' bedroom at like 4:30, like, or like doing it out in the lounge in the dark and it's just like, it ain't it. So I'm like thinking about, I reckon if I joined like a gym, like a 24-hour one, like I feel like I'd probably be a bit more motivated.
Yeah. Like, 'cause there might be other people around or whatever, but, but, but nah, the running, I'm, yeah, I'm fucking like obsessed with it, so I'm just... Yeah. I get ex- I get excited to run, so, um, yeah. That's good. I wouldn't say I've lost motivation there at all.
What advice would you give someone who feels stuck today?
Fuck, make a change. Mm. You know, do, do something. Do something small, you know. I feel like people try to make these like big astronomical like changes to their life, and it's like, it's just unrealistic. Like, "I'm never gonna drink again." Yeah, you are. You're gonna drink probably in three days.
That's the thing.
And every time you like wake up hungover, it's like you're never gonna drink again. Yeah. It's like,
yes you are. You're probably gonna drink that night- Yeah ... '
cause
you feel like shit. But yeah, the biggest piece of advice I think w- would be like make, make small changes. You know what I mean? Like, you don't have to be a runner.
You don't have to necessarily even go to the gym. But like make some small changes, um, you know, because that, I feel like those small changes will have the biggest, the biggest difference in lots of other things. And I feel like for me as well, one of the biggest things I've learned is like- Like, it's crazy, like the opportunities that present themselves because of the little things that you've decided to do True You know, it might not happen in like a week, but like where I am now, six months ago, I never thought that-
Mm
some of the things that have happened would have happened. So yeah, those little changes can make the biggest difference, I think.
What are you mo- most grateful for today?
My girls, my partner. Two healthy girls, beautiful partner, um, good family. So that's what I'm... My physical health, mental health, um, yeah.
Mm. All that stuff.
Appreciate it.
Yeah.
All good.
Sweet.
Keep punching the pavements.
Cheers, brother.